By Barry Rueger
Published: iPaper
April 11, 2026
1232 words
I cook, clean and keep the house while my wife is a Cambridge scholar. I didn’t expect this complete loss of identity
I know which brand of Greek yoghurt to buy, and how often to order fruit and snacking veggies from Waitrose. I keep the kitchen clean, and wash the dishes. I know when we’re running low on soaps and staples, and where best to buy them. I check the mail each day, and take outgoing packages to the post office.
I also do all our washing. Laundry goes into a cold wash. That’s simple, but only my clothes go into the dryer – Susan’s clothes ALL hang to dry. That careful separation saves me from accusations of, “You put that in the dryer? It’s ruined.”
For the past year, I have been an accidental tradhusband and the stay-at-home partner of Cambridge scholar, Susan. She is spending a year completing an Mphil degree in Musicology. Before we relocated from Vancouver to Cambridge, I knew that my role was to support, to take care of the day-to-day things so that Susan could focus exclusively on her intense course of study.
Read the entire column on-line at The iPaper.